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Wednesday, October 5th, 2005
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8:44 am - Day 1 of 21 - 0 lbs lost, 30 to go!!! CW 205lbs
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Have no excuse as to why I've been absent aside from good old fashioned sloth...and a complete monitor meltdown, but that's beside the point!
So, rather than wax on about whereI went wrong I'm just going to jump back in and outline my new plan:
1200 calories max a day with no starchy carbs after 4pm!
Wean my ass off the diet soda (again!!!)
Water, water, water!!! At least 5 pint glasses a day
Ultimate meal (this kick ass health drink/suplement/meal replacement that's vegan and totally organic) at least 1x per day
Burn 1,000 cal on the treadmill daily (okay 5 days a week, 2 500 cal days.)
Upper body weight training 3x/week
"Core Secrets" 3x week
This plan is the plan until and through October 25 at which time I'll revamp the plan for my trip back East until November 1 at which time I'll re-revamp the plan for opening day at Mammoth Mountain.
I want to come up with "rewards" for acheiving different goals. My first goal is at 185lbs I'll get a haircut. Woo hoo!
Just wanted to get all this down!
Also, if you are reading this, please, please, please leave a comment with your url as I'm using a loaner laptop for the next month or so and don't have any of my bookmarks!
Talk soon!!!
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| Friday, September 16th, 2005
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8:04 am - Qucik Update!
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I've been sick and out of commission! Also (heed the warning!), all the barefoot treadmilling has resulted im my developing a blister on the bottom of my foot. Bah! Sounds like nothing, but it KILLS!
Will spend the day trying to recoup and prehaps work up the energy to rn a few veery important errands! When I'm better I will begin "Plan Allan" an 1100-calorie, fat burning assault on the 60 lbs that stand between me and untimate hotness!
Must rest!!!
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| Monday, September 12th, 2005
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8:57 am - Don't know what to say...
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All right, kids... Listen up, but don't, I repeat, DON'T, try this at home. Yesterday I grimaced through my flip flop and then bare foot (think Zola Bud!) treadmilling and managed to eat well. Corn Flakes for break, pasta w/ sauce and mozerella and a salad for lunch and then a small salad for dinner. Eating a reasonable dinner was a fluke. I had planned meatloaf, but my husband got home late and I decided at about 8pm that I wasn't even hungry. Anyway, I woke up this morn and hopped on the scale only to see...195.5 lbs! What the fuck! That's more of a shock than actually gaining the weight to begin with! I guess a lot of it was just bloat and "phantom weight." Regardless, I'll take it! Would be nice to be back to 189.5 (my lowest weight of this blogging round) for Palm Springs on Sunday. We'll see!
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| Sunday, September 11th, 2005
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12:00 pm - I love this plan I'm on!
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I still haven't come up with a concrete plan, but what I'm doing seems to be working. I woke up this morn down another 1/2 pound to 189.5. I'll take it! Especially considering my 4pm "snack" consisted of a sleeve of saltines, 2 lo cal laughing cow cheese wedges and about 2 servings of Dots. For dinner I had the super scrummy homemade mini-pizza with mozerella and pepperoni. Break and lunch were the same as yesterday. But the difference, I swear, was the workout. My plan is to burn 1,000 calories on the treadmill a day, mainly by walking hills, in addition to weights and such. Please! When I do go back to a concrete "plan" please remind me of this and tell me to get my ass back on the treadmill regardless of whether I've slipped.
I am still having shoe problems, though. I wanted to take another day off from the sneakers as the back of my foot is still tender. I did my 1,000 cals in 80:50 today. I did 40:00 min in fliop flops, 5 in bare feet and the rest with socks on. We are going to Palm Springs next Sundat for one night and I am definitely looking forward to soaking my aching bits in the hot springs. Yum!
Anyway, I'm off. Have a great day everyone!
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| Saturday, September 10th, 2005
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2:29 pm - Cardio complete!
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So, I just finished my cardio session...in flip flops!!! Granted they are sturdy, arched soled flips from Nike, but I miss the sneaks. I put them on and was in agony 10 seconds into my cardio. The back of my foot, just under the achilles (must do a google search on what this part is called) is so tender and actually puffy. Doesn't ache...only hurts when I touch it (so as you can imagine I spend most of the day poking it, just to make sure it still hurts). Hopefully it will go away with time. I blame my new sneaks.
I still have to do my upper body w/o but will save that for Big Brother. Am in the mood for pizza, so think I will try to make my own healthy version. Whole wheat crust rolled super thin, my homemade sauce and low fat cheese and lots of veggies. I love brocoli and garlic on my pizza. I swear its my only healthy habit!
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10:11 am - Regrouping...
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So, I still haven't come up with a surefire "plan" but I'm beginning to think I should try to fly solo come Monday and see what happens. Yesterday was far from a stellar eating day, but I didn't binge. I ate what I wanted when I was hungry and weighed in this am at 199lbs!!! Holy crap! Did I mention that "eat what I wanted when I was hungry: included the following:
B-1/2 oatmeal with brown sugar and butter
L-1 cup w.w. pasta w/ tomato sauce, mixed greens with regular dressing
S-Famous Star (that'a a cheese burger to those of you not on the West Coast) and larges fries and a c.c. cookie from Carl's Jr.
D-Sushi...crispy rice and tuna (4 pieces), 4 1/2 (4 pieces), rainbow roll, (2 pieces)
I think the big factor was that miraculously I drank lots of water (beware of a Coca Cola stock plummet when the market bell rings on Monday) and I've been hitting the treadmill to the point where I think I've injured the back of my foot. New shoes and over zealous treadmill sessions apparently don't mix. After sushi, the husband wanted dessert and I realized I didn't even feel like it, so I opted out. How normal of me!
So, what to do? My main priority today is to get my ass on that treadmill even if I have to do it in flip flops! I also want to hit the weights. As far as food, the "official" diet doesn't start until Monday so for today and tomorrow I plan to log my food and eat what I want when I am hungry.
I slipped on the dread snowboard pants and while they technically fit, I looked like one of those skiiers who hadn't hit the slopes since '84 and when invited on a trip decided to cram themselves back into their old outfit despite the fact they've gained forty pounds. Ugh! Also, I have to wash the pants and God knows how much that will shrink them up.
I ordered "Core Secrets" about a month ago and the ball they sent me would not stay inflated. I received the replacement ball today, so that should be a fun addition to my plan.
Enough talk! I need to do a quick tidy and then hit the treadmill!
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| Friday, September 9th, 2005
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5:52 pm - Quick Update
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Time for aquick update. Didn't go nuts on the food today...but there's still time! Just kidding. We're going out for sushi tonight, which I totally need! There's something about raw fish that just clears my brain right up. I still feel groggy and light headed from my trip but am planning to come up with some sort of diet game plan this weekend and officially re-start on Monday.
I did a massive cardio session yesterday as well as today which has resulted in a nice downward motion of the scale. I was 202.5 when I woke up this morn and saw 199 lbs when I hopped on the scale after my workout. Woo hoo! I swear, exercise is the clincher for me. I know it takes exercise AND diet, but I know I need to focus on working out regardless of my eating habits. At least then I can keep things in check!
Have a great night and thanks for all the sweet comments!
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| Thursday, September 8th, 2005
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7:30 am - I'm back!
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So, I'm back from visting with my family and ready to eat a huge piece of humble pie, which sadly is the only dessert I can eat in safety right now. Ugh! To be honest, I have been putting off this update. So shameful! Not only did I gain weight, but I weighed 205lbs this morn...a full pound over my highest "blog weight." FUCK!!!! But the deal is I have to do something different from what I've done my entire life. I need to continue on here blogging about my gains and (please...please...please!!!) my losses and all that is going on in my life.
I was prepared to be stressed out at my parents, but I had no idea how bad my dad would be. Wow. I knew he was bad...he hasn't recognized me in about two years...but now he is declining so quickly. He refuses to shower and actually starts hyperventilating when you try to force him in there. My mom cleans the bathroom about six times a day and its still hideous. The house smells awful and my mom has always been fastidious about cleaning. These things sounds superficial, I know, but they just compound the fact that it is becoming more and more evident that my dad will not be around forever...quite a pill to swallow when you thrive on denial!
This is hard as hell on my mom, too, and I'm guilty as hell that I live 3,000 miles away. I've been going back every two or so months, but I wish it could be more.
So this is a diet blog and it is about diet that I will rant! There is a certain immediacy to my weight loss as Nov. 11 is the first day of snowboarding season and I i must, must, must fit into my snowboarding pants whick means at the most I can weigh 175bs. Of course, I could just buy new pants, but I refuse to spend hundreds on a piece of clothing I hope to not have to wear for very long. Also, there is the factor of safety. I need to be in shape. Strong and fit.
So, what's my plan? I guess I should hit the points again. Simple and to the point. And back on the treadmnill.
Ugh...
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| Tuesday, August 30th, 2005
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4:03 pm - Off to the Cape!
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This will probably be my last update before I head off to my parents. I think I weigh around 195 today, but I've become a little suspect of my scale. Don't know if its too low or too high, but it seems to swing a lot. Whatever. I actually feel okay with it today, but can't wait to start a new ulra-obsessive anal diet and ecxercise plan when I get back! My immediate goal will be to fit comfortably into my snowboarding outfit by November, as that's way too much money to blow because of a few extra pounds.
Anyway, I seem to have inadvertently "quit" diet soda for the past two days and I feel like crap. Headache, neckache, metallic taste in my mouth, dizziness, nausea...what the hell is in that shit that my body is having such a tough time doing without? Heroin? I know its not the caffeine, because I drink plenty o' coffee. Besides, as of late, diet Sprite w/ Splenda has been my drug of choice. Wow...makes you think, huh?
So, I fell flat on my face in terms of reaching a mini-goal of 179.5 by tomorrow. To be honest, I pretty much self-destructed. I could have done it. I was right on track. Weight loss is mental.
Later!
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| Monday, August 29th, 2005
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9:04 am - Rewritten update!
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I just wrote a nice long update and then promptly (accidentally) ereased it. Hate that!!!! Anyway here are the bullet points:
-Weighed in today at 197 (same weight as Thursday when I left for camping trip...but I didn't journal about that.)
-Camping was awesome...saw a bear...that makes 14 bear sightings in my lifetime!
-3 meals a day isn't working as I eat one big meal from 3pm until bedtime
-Back to points!!! Simple, simple, simple!
-Hit the treadmill today!
-Weights today!
-Ugh! Just got my period...probably why I haven't lost...
More later!!!
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| Tuesday, August 23rd, 2005
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1:27 pm - Milestone!
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Quick update! I just noticed that its been a month and two days since I started this blog and in that amount of time I have lost 8.5 lbs. Not too shabby! Not exactly my dream weight loss, but if I can do that every month, I'll be at 135lbs by March 2006...what a great b-day present that would be to myself!
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1:12 pm - Day...ahhhh...ummm...sort of lost count - 193 lbs -13.5 to mini-goal
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So, I'm still not back on the wagon. I think I have one foot firmly aboard but the rest of me is being dragged along behind. Alas, despite eating in a manner that would make even a 7-year-old blush, I have kept both feet firmly on the exercise wagon. Perhaps that's how I managed to lose a pound. I've pretty much resigned myself to not reaching my mini-goal and as things look to be getting a little out of the routine coming up, I'm changing my plan until about September 7th. I'm going camping this weekend for four days and then next Wednesday am going back east for a week. My plan is to not worry about Points and instead eat three reasonable meals a day and exercise as I've been doing. No snacks. Simple.
I'm not worried about this weekend as I am a hiking junkie and my husband and I can do over night treks in a day. The last time we went camping (Yosemite) I ate obscene amounts of meat, potatoes, s'mores, chips, you name it and lost about fice pounds. The secret to that loss was a 12 mile hike (among others) where the downhills were even more treacherous and required more exertion than the(many, many) uphills. So, I'm not worried about this weekend. I might not even lose weight, but if I stick to plan I don't think I'll gain.
The week back east will be trickier. My mom and I have many days of lunches and shopping planned. I'm there to be with her, as she takes care of my dad who has very, very advanced dementia but is not yet bedridden. If I just eat at meals, I think I'll be ok there, too. I always end up bingeing when I go home, but I really want to eat normally this visit. This could be the last time I spend with my dad and I don't want sugar highs, blood sugar surges and food obsession to cloud it. Eating normally...now there's a feat!
Anyway, my posts will be sporadic until the 2nd week of September, but I will try to check in.
Later!!!!
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| Friday, August 19th, 2005
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8:22 am - Day 10 of 21 - 193.5 lbs - 5 lbs down - 14 to go
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Blech! I hate the "failure" updates!!! I've been whooping it up off the wagon for the past few days! Luckily, I've stayed on the exercise wagon and am pretty bloated, so I think I'll be "back down" to my fighting weight (189.5) soon. But let me tell you! Eating all that crap was really, really worth it! Thank God I got to trythe abomination that is Burger King's "chicken fries" before I died! I'm kidding...
So, Since I've started this blog I've had 2 major "fallouts." I know people don't think you should ascribe negative traits to food, but what I do is negative. Very negative. Personally, I think a slice of cake, pot pie or some other indulgence on occassion is fine. Perfectly human. But when I go off plan, I'm the gastromnomical equivalent to Robert Downey that weekend in Palm Springs. It ain't pretty.
I know my first 4 day binge was set off by the new owners of my building telling me they needed more money from me pronto and a bossy neighbor trying to convince me and the rest of the building to stand our ground and not pay. Well, um, as not paying rent is generally regarded as grounds for eviction, I paid and the problem that I thought could only be solved by a drive by a McDs is now a distant memory.
My most recent binge was triggered by my making a bad call playing online poker and going all in and losing. Well...that's the nature of gambling and so if I want to gamble, I can't let it get me down! It's tough being a control freak in this world of folk who won't comply with my every whim!
Yesterday was a shit day fitness-wise that I totally turned around! I've been thinking about going to the Wednesday and Thursday runs sponsored by Nike. They offer 1, 3 and 5 mile routes. Since I've been doing a lot of run/walking, I decided to hop on the mill at 0% incline and see how long I could run. I did 3 miles in about 37:40 and pulled out a 5K (3.1 miles) about a minute after that. Not too shabby, although I don't know what people run.
Oh, well...my goals for today are to count points and to slog it out on the mill for 60 minutes and do some abs. By the way...I can totally see the difference in my arms! Crazy!
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| Tuesday, August 16th, 2005
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11:31 am - Day 7 of 21 -189.5 lbs - 9 lbs lost - 10 to go to reach mini-goal!!!
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Can that be right? Regardless, I'll take it!!! i worked out like a freak yesterday. Again, I started off on the treadmill sluggish and after 5 minutes hopped off to do upper body weights. Thinking I was going to be super slack when I got back on the mill, I did 4 sets of 12 of my usual 5 exercises (I've been slacking on biceps, because I always feel that they get worked anyway). I actually did 4 sets of tripceps until exhaustion. I only did one set of 12 of each of my three abs exercises and then hopped back on the mill expecting to slog out 30 minutes. I decided to walk at what I like to call "incline intervals" so that I could take it easy on my knees. That means I stick to a slow pace (about 3.4 or 3.3 MPH) and raise the incline by .5 each minute until I reach the max and then bring it down. I got all involved watching "The Girls Next Door" on MTV or VH1 and kept going. I hit 30 minutes and told myself I'd keep going as until the end of the show. Well, the show ended and another episode came on. Well, I thought, it looks like I'm going to do my 60 minutes today. At 60 minutes another episode came on and I decided to run for a while. I then thought it would be fun to hit the 1,000-calories burned mark. So, I slogged it out and found that my machine only goes to 999-calories. I could have had a heart attack trying to burn that last calorie!
I got off soon after that, having run/walked for 104 minutes! In addition to being psyched with myself, I also felt a little psycho. Isn't that what obsessed teens who launch peo-anorexia/bulimia sites do? Ugh. I've had a bad history with food and did not want to go there. Then my brother called. He's an avid runner/bicycler/general exerciser. I told him about my workout and he wasn't shocked at all. He said when he's stressed out he always runs (no walks for him!) for over an hour. It's true. He's never been fat in his life, and I know he worries about me and another brother because we eat when we're stressed. And there is a lot of family stress going on. My dad is sick and getting worse by the day and this brother's marriage appears to be in its last minutes. My dad exercised away his stress and my mom ate hers away. There are six of us kids, and I think we are evenly split between camps. I think my sister falls into both camps, which keeps her far from fat.
Anyway, what about that weight! 189.5lbs!!! There is nothing as nice as sneaking into a new weight decade. I swear I'm terrified of a scale correction! I'm almost too afraid to eat! Okay, now I sound psycho. I just can't believe that I may actually meet this crazy Extreme Makeover-inspired mini-goal that I've set for myself. Woo hoo!
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| Monday, August 15th, 2005
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9:44 am - Day 6 of 21 - 192 lbs - 6.5 down...12.5 to go to mini-goal
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I'm not feeling particularly motivated today, but I realize that as long as I keep doind what I set out to do, the motivation will at some point kick in. I'm especially excited that I enjoyed two luscious meals out this weekend and still dropped weight! Woo hoo! Now that's the stuff!
It's funny, now that I don't have binges and sugar and all that ilk clouding my brain (truly!) I've been able to look at my life and wonder..."What the fuck am I doing!!!" Seriously, I'm a 32-y-o able bodied person who is not working! And to be honest, I don't even keep the best house or have dinner waiting for my husband when he gets home. I'm allegedly supposed to be working on my book. Its finished, an editor is interested and I'm supposed to be rewriting it, but because not all the feedback I've received is glowing I just sunk deeper into my wallow pad. I guess it wouldn't take any sort of degree to determine that I've been depressed...seriously "not leave the house depressed" but ugh! I hate that! I really feel like I "woke up" today. Now, let's just hope I do something about it!
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| Sunday, August 14th, 2005
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9:14 pm - Day 5 Update
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So, we did not go for the bike ride as hub slept in late. Instead we went to the Cheesecake Factory where we split a lunch sized pertion of cob salad (he had taquitos as well...and a slice of cheesecake) and saw "Skeleton Key" which I sadly did not find at all scary. I hate that! Seriously, I'm finding it harder and harder to justify spending $12.50 + parking (!!!!) to see a movie that I can't wait to end.
I mentally flagged today as a day to take it easy on exercise...I planned on doing the 60 minutes, but decided I'd walk at a low incline. My husband came in during my initial run and started freaking out over the size of my butt. As I'm trying to will myself to increase the speed and incline he's yelling, "Holy shit! You're ass is HALF the size it was a month ago!" Wow! Now, that's what I'd call inspiration! I love it! I ended up staying on the mill for 70 minutes, which was just a hair over 4 miles.
I'm feeling trimmer today. God, it has been SO LONG since I've been able to say that! Anyway, day 5 is in the bag!
Good night!
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8:04 am - Day 5 of 21 - 194.5 lbs - 4 down 15 to go to mini-goal
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Wow! A little food makes a lot of diference! I had so much more energy yesterday. Had the usual break and lunch (although added the dread ff cheese - bleck!) and added another small bowl of yogurt with blueberries and yogurt at 3:30p. Yum! The hub and i went out for Indian and we split chicken tikka (w/ extra onions) and panir sag. So good! I also had a cup of lentil soup. Not sure exactly how these dishes are made, but there were really no overt starches (hmmm...except for the lentils...now that I think about it) and the scale was good to me, so I'm not going to fuss.
Workout was great yesterday! Didn't run as much as the day before, but walked fast up "incline intervals" for an hour and then did upper body and abs. Feel good.
Today I the hub and i were planning to bike to the beach and back. Not sure how long a trip it is. He said 14 miles round trip but it didn't seem to be that long...I'll check it out.
Have a great day, all!!
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| Saturday, August 13th, 2005
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9:25 am - Day 4 Update! I'm an ass!
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Hmmm...so I've been bitching alot of late of being ravenous, having migraines, no energy, blah, blah, blah, blah... Well, I think I may have figured out my problem. I went back to my food journal and filled it in for the past few days and guess what? I've been eating no where NEAR the calories I need to...or in the simplied terms I am currently using...nowhere near the Points I should! No joke, as in I can eat 24 Points a day and on Day 1 of my 21 day plan I ate 6 Points (wtf!). No wonder I was laying on the couch with a migraine all shaky and desperate. And on top of that, I have diligently been doing my 60 min on the treadmill and weights, abs, etc.
This takes such a load off...there is nothing worse than feeling like the time you will spend losing your weight will be hell. Ugh! I feel better! I just have to get back to more diligent Points tracking!
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8:33 am - Day 4 of 21 - 196 lbs - 2.5 lbs down 16.5 to go!
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Made it through last night and am now able to put another succesful notch in my belt! Was positive I would hit 195 or lower today, as I saw that on the scale yesterday until dinner. Will probably register today after my coffee...
So, I went to Trader Joe's yesterday and thought I would get some fat free cheese as I love me my cheese and worry about the calories. Do people get used to this shit or does everyone just buy it once with the best of intentions and then just swear off cheese forever. Ugh! It was nasty! It looked like it belonged the "play kitchen" of my childhood (yes, I played with plastic food as a toddler...do you think that could have led me to where I am today?). For dinner I had my usual chicken breast with half a can of green beans and thought it might be nice to put a little fat free cheese on top on the beans and melt them and nuke them for a few seconds in order to get it all nice and melty! First up, it took a got minute to get anysort of action of the cheese, while the poor green beans began to petrify. The whole thing was dideous...absolutely hideous.
Not sure what's on the docket for today. Husband's still lolling in bed. Might go for that bike ride to the beach again...that was fun. Who knows...
Have a great one!
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| Friday, August 12th, 2005
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7:31 pm - Day 3 of 21 - 197 lbs. 1.5 down 17.5 to go!
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Ugh! I'm tired and still not feeling "with it." Thanks to the hub hitting the market last night, I had a yummy break of ff yogurt, 1/2 Optimum cereal and freash blueberries and strawberries! So good! Energized me enough to run/walk for 60 minutes on the treadmil with very step inclines. I definitely ran over half the time...probably about 45 minutes of it. Unfortunatey my legs ache, but I'm hoping the reward will be on the scale.
I'm having a bout of the "poor me's" and "why bothers" today. Ugh! I want to binge sooooo bad! This plan I'm on is pretty extreme, but I really want to see a little progress before "moderating" my plan and shooting for a pound-and-a-half a week. But I'm gloomy. Hub wanted to go see Deuce Biglow, but I just want to stay home and veg. I'm pooped but anxious...such an annoying combo!
Hope everyone has an awesome weekend!!!
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